Grace and Gratitude

This winter in Chicago has been gray—the sky permanently overcast, with feeble light, the color of weak tea filtering into my apartment. The sun sets as early at 4pm in mid-December, and even now, sunset is before 5pm. The effects of so little daylight vary person-to-person, but I am one of those who feels sluggish, loses motivation, and generally struggles to get things done. No matter what I tell myself, no matter how much I exercise or stick to other healthy habits, I still need the light to really feel like myself.

I’m fortunate, though, because I live in a time where we know that bright light therapy can treat these symptoms, and because I can afford the cost of a light therapy lamp. It’s an ugly lamp, and honestly, I feel like a plate of food sitting under a warming lamp at a restaurant when I use it. But thankfully, it’s doing the trick. I have a little more motivation to do my work, and yes, even write this devotional.

As I try to pull some meaning from this experience, I reflect on two themes. The first is grace; I need to give myself some grace here. Biologically, I need the light. We all function best when our biological needs are met. When they are not met, and we struggle; instead of expecting ourselves to grit our teeth and power through, we can choose to treat ourselves with compassion. The second theme is gratitude. I’m thankful that I have access to simple, effective tool to meet my need. I’m thankful for the scientists who identified this treatment, and for the means to buy it.

Creator, may we remember to give ourselves grace when we struggle, and to be thankful when there is relief. May we work toward a world where all who suffer find peace and comfort.

Elizabeth is a Peace Church member who chooses to live in Chicago, despite the winters.