One Wild and Precious Life

That Mary Oliver line, more like a Bible verse than a coffee mug cliche’, comes to mind a lot more now. In the nine months since our younger child went to college, leaving the care and feeding of only ourselves and the dog to worry about, I’ve wrestled with the question of purpose. The thing at the top of my “list” for the past 22 years is mothering people, which happens mostly over the phone these days. I’ll admit to feeling a real sense of loss and even a loss of purpose, of usefulness. The rhythms of work, weekends, and chores lost their shape during the first year of covid, even with all of us at home. Since the world has opened back up and the kids are both away, those daily rhythms have taken shape again, but it’s been harder to find meaning in them. 

As a woman well into my 30s when I became a mother, I’m so aware of the good fortune of being able to make that choice and, equally important, the ability to put it off during the years when I was single, busy with school and work and dating, and had no plans to raise a child. What I did have was resources: a job, healthcare and health insurance, and a network of family and friends who could provide help if I became pregnant when it wasn’t the right time for me to be a mother.

Lately the question, “What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” has taken on greater urgency. Sometimes the world makes your choices crystal clear. I have privilege and purpose and I can add my voice to the chorus it will take to see that other women have the same choices I did. I can advocate in these ways:

Offer support, logistical, emotional, and financial support, to women seeking abortion. 

Donate to a local Abortion Fund (there are 80 around the country).

Say the word ABORTION. Support access by saying the word out loud and explain why it’s important. I’ll make sure my children know how I feel and I will say the word, to destigmatize it and remove shame from abortion access and care. 

(Paraphrased from Megan Jeyifo, Exec. Dir. of Chicago Abortion Fund)

There is purpose in advocacy on every level, whether you’re holding a sign on the steps of the Supreme Court or having coffee with a friend who needs to hear where you stand. Abortion is healthcare. Abortion access is a justice issue. Abortion providers are doing healthcare and justice work. 

Holy One,

Thank you for your steadfast love and care. Thank you for healthcare providers, counselors, advocates and activists. 

Amen

Eli is a song leader at Peace. She’s working on getting used to an “empty nest,” just in time for her kids’ summer break from college.

 

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